Are you aware of your inner critic? You know … that voice in your head that tells you you can’t do anything right. Most of us have an insidious inner critic that sounds like someone from our past: Ma, Pa, teacher, pastor, coach, older sibling. Who does yours sound like? Mine is usually my Dad. For the longest time I didn’t even notice those cutting remarks as a separate voice. It beat me up for years before I recognized it WASN’T ME…until that night camping by the Colorado River in Utah years ago and all else was quiet. I was building a campfire. Out of nowhere, a voice in my head tells me I am doing it wrong. What? I was completely alone and had been for days. I grew up in the mountains of Colorado and have built hundreds of fires, and yet here it was. That voice. Even though home in his bed, my Dad was in my head!

Separating From the Critic

We must first recognize, then learn to separate who we really are—”Spirit stuff” connected to and of Spirit, from this mealy-mouthed creature I’m calling the critic. (It reminds me of Gollum in the Hobbit Trilogy). When I can separate from it, its big mean face crumbles as the façade that it is, sort of like the man behind the curtain in the Wizard of Oz. “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain” is sound advice. That little bit of separation breaks the illusion. My nature, our nature, is kind. That is what is real. The rest of it is a mealy-mouthed whiner bent on causing us misery and it doesn’t deserve the attention we give it.

Sometimes separating from that voice is hard. I don’t think it’s a matter of self-discipline. As a matter of fact, sometimes the more we resist it, the more persistent it gets. The more we try to control it, the more subtle it becomes. It’s still there; it’s just more elusive.

Are you sick of it yet?

Releasing your inner critic is possible for you. There’s an easy way to start to let go of your inner critic.  Critic eradication is important for divorcing folk because the critic has so much power over us when love pulls away. It’s an important part of recovering from divorce, but even more than that, it’s critical to your happiness moving forward.

Call me and let’s get that slimy rascal critic unwrapped from around your heart!

Jeannine

P.S. You deserve to know who you REALLY are!