After Divorce

/After Divorce

Tying Up Loose Ends After Divorce? Your heart is probably still hurting with heart-piercing zingers firing at you from commercials, or the comments of friends, or memories. Maybe you can’t find it in your heart to forgive just yet and find the peace that forgiveness brings. Perhaps there are ongoing financial stresses or disagreements with others in your life that you’d like to work through.

Wrap It In Love

Wrap It In Love

wrap it in love

I’ve discovered a new practice for neutralizing life’s jolting incoming missiles. You know the ones I mean, errant thoughts or comments from others that seemingly come from nowhere and before you know it you’re bummed out, angry, flustered, or crying. If you want to neutralize them here’s my secret: wrap it in love.

I like to wrap the harsh/painful thoughts in love in the same way I would wrap something in bacon, or chocolate, to make it more palatable. If this “thing” is going to come into […]

By | July 7th, 2016|Categories: After Divorce, Creating Your Happy Life Again, Forgiveness, Live Better, Reclaiming Your Power|Tags: , , , |Comments Off on Wrap It In Love

The Secret to Finding Yourself

The Secret to Finding Yourself

I’ve known for nearly two decades that I was in turmoil. I’d been in it so long I’d come to think that turmoil is just the way life is. What I didn’t realize is how lost in the weeds I’d been until I recently found myself in a peaceful meadow. Like the noisy refrigerator in the corner of the room, I didn’t really notice the clamoring I have been living with until it turned off. Are you interested in finding yourself, too?

After so long, I’d gotten used […]

Listen to Your Heart

Is It Time to Listen To Your Heart?

listen-to-your-heart

Have you noticed how quickly life moves these days? Is it just because I’m older, or maybe busier? I’ve heard that life is like a roll of toilet paper (going faster at the end) but I’m a little shocked that it goes this fast. Time to hang on tight cuz things are moving.

In a lot of ways speedy movement is good news. Just like they say about Colorado weather. If you don’t like it this 5 minutes, wait a few and it will be entirely […]

Have You Lost Love?

Blue fractal heart

Have You Lost Love?

That’s kind of a silly question isn’t it? If we are older than about one day, we have lost love of some kind. Or at least it feels that way.

If you feel like you’ve lost love, and want it back, this article is for you.

Although I would have pushed back on anyone who tried to tell me this in the past, I have come to know that we cannot lose love. Why?

Love lives in us, not outside us.

Life events, upbringing, along with evidence we’ve gathered to the […]

Failure of a Collaborative Divorce Case

I just witnessed the failure of a collaborative divorce case for the first time. It is disheartening. They will now be going to court with their own lawyer.

Burden or Blessing?

Burden or Blessing?

Burden or Blessing

I woke up early this morning. 4:00 a.m. seems to be the time for processing. Have you noticed that? Some little zinger will zip across my mind demanding to be dealt with and sleep vanishes. This morning it was a regret I have about my father’s memorial. There were enough smaller conversations going on in the room that we didn’t gather everyone into one place to share stories. I may regret that forever. Not just for me but for my kids and grandkids who will never hear […]

By | November 30th, 2015|Categories: After Divorce, Divorce Recovery, Uncategorized|Comments Off on Burden or Blessing?

Conquering the Inner Critic

Are You Tired of Your Inner Critic?

innercritic

Are you aware of your inner critic? You know … that voice in your head that tells you you can’t do anything right. Most of us have an insidious inner critic that sounds like someone from our past: Ma, Pa, teacher, pastor, coach, older sibling. Who does yours sound like? Mine is usually my Dad. For the longest time I didn’t even notice those cutting remarks as a separate voice. It beat me up for years before I recognized it WASN’T ME…until that night camping by […]

Transitions – Insights Do Come

Transitions – Insights Do Come

transitions

I’ve experienced many transitions. So have you, even if you didn’t recognize it at the time. Having just come through another one, I’m gaining all kinds of new insights. The loss part kind of sucks. The in-between stage was dismantling with all the fears that brings. The new beginning part is starting to make sense of it all.

I remember the first major transition I went through, which culminated in ending my marriage of 30 years. I didn’t have any idea what was happening to me then. At the time I’d been […]

A Season of Discontent

A Season of Discontent

 Season of Discontent

Discontent is hard to live with. Discontent with life. Discontent with partner. Discontent with work. If you are one who is in such a season, it seems all the world is tugging at you to be a certain way, to keep up the facade of normalcy, to ignore the fire roaring inside you that would cause you to scream and run away to a simpler life, to tend the fire burning inside. You need down time to ponder the changes going on inside you. You simply […]

The Upside of Emotional Crashes

The Upside of Emotional Crashes

The Upside of Emotional Crashes

I’ve lived a helluva life. In a little over a decade I’ve moved at least a dozen times, been in two car-totaling crashes, and been through two divorces. Those are the things I can quantify. The list doesn’t include financial crashes, computer crashes and emotional crashes. I’ve wondered what I’m missing that I require these hard lessons over and over. Is it just a string of bad luck? Did I sign up for this in some way? Is this just the way […]